Thursday, November 17, 2005

Senor Octopus is Dead

Yesterday Slappy was bundled into a car and brought to a funeral parlor. Slappy was confused as his master had already been planted in the ground. Yet Slappy was ready to kick up his heels and swing from the chandeliers, if given a chance. That is when Slappy learned that Mr. Octopus was dead due to the beating he received after the party where he told children to stick knives in their friends heads during a rousing game of Simon Says.

Due to a Mr. Octopus being completely delusional during his last request, which was deemed legally binding, the pallbearers were three former vaudevillians, a horse named Elmo, a small statue of the Pope, and Slappy. The mourners struggled with how to accomodate Mr. Octopus's last wishes, yet still manage to get his stupid corpse into the ground.

A resolution was found when former world's strongest man, Magnus von Magnusson, volunteered to heft old Octopus into the hole in the ground. The vaudevillians huddled around the front of the coffin, while the Pope statue and Slappy were hung off it's side. Slappy did so enjoy his ride and promptly broke the head off the Pope. David Soul had wanted to attend the funeral, but he could not. Slappy bets David was making phone calls and patting roosters.

10 Comments:

Blogger Monica said...

I would think being hung from the side of a coffin would have pleased the Great Slappy mightily?

6:37 PM  
Blogger Übermilf said...

Now what will become of Slappy?

What if they sell you on E-bay to a amateur comedian who will tour the local comedy clubs on open mike night?

The horror.

11:31 PM  
Blogger Mr. Paul Freeman, CEO said...

Generally breaking the head off the pope is an unattainable goal in life.

Congratulations.

Now if only you will illuminate us on what his last request was, I can die with less kicking and screaming.

Signed,
The Big F

3:51 PM  
Anonymous Carousel horse said...

Slappy the Zombie GREAT title this post. I am actually looking for Carousel horse related information to give my customers on my website. I paused at the title and ran out of time to read, but will book mark you and come back latter to check you out some more. I am off to find some other Carousel horse related blogs. Thank you.

9:01 AM  
Blogger Calzone said...

LMAO...I went to the aquarium awhile ago and I wished I could kill the octopus so bad

9:51 AM  
Anonymous equestrian jewelry said...

Hey Slappy the Zombie GREAT title this post. Thats what actually caught my eye. I was surfing blogs to try and help my customers and visitors with information on my website about ##Keyword## and paused to read but ran out of time. I will book mark it and come back to read later. This isn't really what I was looking for what I really need is information about http://www.horse-lover-gift-ideas-central.com related subjects but thank you and I shall return. I wish you well.

10:37 AM  
Blogger Übermilf said...

Horse lovers? That sounds dirty!

11:46 AM  
Anonymous equestrian jewelry said...

Hey Slappy the Zombie GREAT title this post. Thats what actually caught my eye. I was surfing blogs to try and help my customers and visitors with information on my website about ##Keyword## and paused to read but ran out of time. I will book mark it and come back to read later. This isn't really what I was looking for what I really need is information about http://www.horse-lover-gift-ideas-central.com related subjects but thank you and I shall return. I wish you well.

11:12 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

I think the Equestrian Jewelry people are a little on the doofy side. Why else post spam TWICE? What a waste. I mean, really, the second time you tell me about Equestrian Jewelry, I am much more likely to buy it than the first. No, really.

I wonder what the heck it is? I am NOT going to go look. But is it... barettes for their manes? Horse-themed pendants? Hoof bracelets (or should I say hooflets)? Tail garnishes? The mind boggles.

12:03 PM  
Blogger Slappy the Zombie said...

Once again Slappy is confused about the spam on his blog. Is there really a market for equestrian jewelry here? Slappy thinks not. In fact, Slappy knows not.

10:36 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home